Luffy  Bandages  BAD IDEA!
by Pokepika's Haunt
Summary: Why you should definitely NOT let Luffy bandage people up...


A/N. The author Everlude gave me the inspiration for this idea while we were talking about the level of interestingness the in-depth bandaging of a sprained ankle has.

Note: I have absolutely no background when it comes to medical procedures for bandaging wounds and stuff. The best I can do is apply Neosporin and a band aid anything past that and you might be better off throwing yourself in front of a moving car. Enjoy!

Summary: Why you should not let Luffy give medical treatment when it comes to wrapping people in bandages. The wrong person gets wrapped up in the first place, and she turns it into a game! Warning: Fem!Luffy fanfic!

**Disclaimer: I do not own One Piece!**

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><p><strong>Luffy + Bandages= BAD IDEA!<strong>

It was a sunny day aboard the Thousand Sunny when they just happened to stumble upon the Heart Pirates. Now they probably would have been at each other's throats normally, but Luffy, captain of the Straw Hat Pirates, was feeling very pacified that day, so she wasn't up for fighting with other captain, "The Surgeon of Death" Trafalgar Law, and his crew at the moment. Seeing as there was no need to start a fight and get people hurt unnecessarily, he agreed to a temporary truce with Luffy and they went about the rest of the day relaxing while Luffy played with her friends. At some point she had even managed to get the ever loyal Bepo involved in one of their more reckless games, her reasoning being that she wanted to hear how loud a bang Bepo would make when he hit the wall of their ship after jumping from the swings. Despite said polar bear's protests, which went completely ignored and unheard, Bepo was forced onto the swing and then unceremoniously pushed off when he refused to jump into what could result in serious injury.

Obviously, Luffy wasn't familiar with the term "careful". And her own crew had yet to introduce it into her vocabulary.

She had pushed Bepo off at the wrong time, and Bepo naturally got hurt. Luffy feeling bad for the injury naturally, offered to bandage Bepo's now sprained paw. The crew's doctor, one Tony Tony Chopper, recommended that maybe he or Law himself should do that. Luffy immediately denied it, stating vehemently that since it was her fault Bepo got hurt, she'd help, after all, how hard could bandaging a sprained ankle be? She'd done it enough times on herself growing up when there was nobody to help lick her wounds so to speak. So she dragged Bepo to the ship's infirmary. All Chopper could do was sigh and hope she didn't wind up causing a more worse injury, because then by all means, Law was permitted retaliate. Luffy would let him, as long as he didn't hurt her crew that is.

So currently, Bepo sat on the infirmary bed while Luffy dug through the cupboards determinedly, looking for the missing bandages. She leaped for joy when she finally found them. Though she didn't really find them. They landed on her head after she shut one cupboards door particularly hard out of frustration.

"Um…" Was all Bepo got to say as Luffy got work…Creating a gigantic mess. She had started out fine with the pre-wrap, working it around Bepo's sprained ankle like an old pro, but then one too many seconds of distraction, and she somehow wound up wrapping her hand along with Bepo's foot.

Luffy could only stare in confusion at the sight. Things only got worse when Luffy tried to undo the wrapping only to wrap up her whole arm.

By the time she was done, she had managed to give herself a full body cast with all but her head covered in wrappings. Bepo just stared in shock and confusion.

She had managed to pull it off in only 5 minutes. And Luffy herself was looking utterly lost as she stood there horribly confused, trying to move her limbs, now stiff with bandages.

Bepo limped out of the infirmary, telling Luffy to wait where she was, though it wasn't like she could get very far in her current condition, as he went to get the two doctors aboard the ship, and maybe both crews to help.

Bepo came back with everybody in tow and the reactions from the Heart Pirates were spectacular. Her own crew had seen this enough times to be more or less desensitized from the sight, though Robin still sported, and probably would always sport, a highly amused smile as she saw her captain pathetically wiggle her arms. She was not getting herself anywhere fast.

Law shook his head at the sight, sighing as he noticed the many left over rolls of wasted medical supplies. The rest of the crew was just gaping in shock. They all just stared when Luffy finally said something.

"I can't feel my arms…Or my legs…I don't think I can feel my spleen either."

"Luffy, you shouldn't be able to feel your spleen unless something is wrong with it."

"So that's good?" Law sighed at the question.

"Yes, that is good." After that was done, Law and the others got work in unwrapping Luffy, she was acting like a worm though, and wouldn't hold still no matter how many death threats Law and the others threw at her as they demands she stand the (insert effective swear word here) still.

By the time they were done, things had gotten very difficult and confusing. Luffy was now unwrapped, but now Law and everybody else was. Law swore loudly, scaring Luffy enough to cause her to run away screaming about "Angry mummies who want to eat my brain!" and for somebody to save her.

It took a whole five hours before everybody got out of their impromptu body wrap. And by then Luffy was long gone, having disappeared somewhere inside Law's submarine. They figured it out after it sank underwater, the entrance hatch tightly shut and sealed thankfully, and nobody was onboard, or should've been anyways.

By the time their ship was back, Law decided that from now on, Luffy was not to help out in the infirmary unless she wanted to actually be mummified. Luffy agreed, as long as Law was present. When eh wasn't, well, they were constantly re-supplying the medical tape and pre-wrap.

It was a whole month before anyone finally figured out that Luffy could indeed bandage a sprained ankle or splint a broken arm or leg without drowning herself or someone else in bandages and medical tape, you just had to keep her from getting distracted for longer than a second.

That was an impossible feat in and of itself.

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><p>AN. Thanks for reading and hope you guys enjoyed it! Please review and see ya!


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